Have you ever felt alone, really alone? Sometimes even you know there are people around you who love you, you find yourself in the grips of a very inexplicable feeling, an isolation of sorts. It needn’t always be melancholic, in an aching sort of way. But, it does well to remind us that we are alone. You know how we sometimes delude ourselves into believing that the success of our near and dear is ours too; well it is, but in a very indirect way. Depending on the intimacy of the relationship, you get to enjoy the payoff. You can share the monetary rewards, the limelight and the glory, but at some point you come to realise that it’s all reflected. You can be a beaming moon, but there will come a time a time when you will want to be the life-giving sun too.

Happiness can be shared, but success and the high it gives you is a very individualistic feeling, a need that you alone can satisfy. Success, here does not refer to professional success alone. It spans the entire gamut of meaningful roles, relationships and activities, although primarily, the lot of us consider success only in professional terms. This could be because it makes people sit up and take notice of us. Perhaps it is this innate need for acknowledgement that makes even a reclusive, introverted person reach out, even if it is just to feed a stray fog or crow.

Consciously or unconsciously, we link our sense of self-worth with success. Which is why every now and then you find yourself confronting these irresponsible questions – am I doing justice to my potential? Is this what I truly want? Am I living up to my expectations? Though phrased differently, it is, intrinsically, the same question in your true self. The frequency with which you find yourself seeking answers depends on your level of acceptance of the choices you have made in life, or as the case may be, the decisions that have been thrust upon you. The latter, too, is a
choice made by us – to submit, to be passive.

It is but wonderful to think that I always have someone at my side, someone who cares for me, someone who will cry for me, laugh with me, someone who will hold my hand and walk the paths I choose to tread, someone who will wipe my tears and attend to my unspoken needs. But the fact of life is that no matter someone loves me; I have to ultimately do what I have to do. I’ve got to do what I’ve got to do.

Neither can someone live your life for you, nor can you live someone else’s life. Each of us has our individual share of responsibilities, dreams and desires, goals and aspirations what we have to carry out ourselves. People can help you, guide you, support you, coach you, be there by your side, but it’s you who has to swim those laps in the Olympics. And if you win, you alone get to climb the victory stand. That said, we would be nowhere without our cheering squads.

You could be a great friend, sibling, spouse, parent, great . . . whatever, but you will never feel complete unless the essence of your being finds utterance. Of course, you never really get there till the end, for life is a constant striving to strike that balance between being sun and the moon.